I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Randomize