the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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