naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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