I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
