I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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