What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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