Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Randomize
