i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
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It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
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I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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