already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
