i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Dignity is for republicans.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
