you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
