I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I wish I only lived at night.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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