i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
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