you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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