As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I smell stomach acid.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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