i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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