i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
ugly people sure do ruin things
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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