The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Randomize
