she smelled like a LAN party
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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