I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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