I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize