I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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