so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
