Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize