So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
