forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize