i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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