Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
