It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
