i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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