This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
