How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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