@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
