Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
