My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize