come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
