would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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