Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
