Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize