he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
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She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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