so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
