Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
