This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
