Me too!
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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