She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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