seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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