thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
