sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
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He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
MIDGETS
????
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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