her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
