So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
