i just had sex bonerless
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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