Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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